Kill.

Oh God, please don't tell me this has been in vain.
I need answers for what all the waiting I've done means.
You kill me, you've got some nerve, but can't face your mistakes.
I know what I should do, but I just can't turn away.

So go on love, leave while there's still hope for escape.

Got to take what you can these days.
There's so much ahead, so much regret.
I know what you want to say.
I know it but can't help feeling differently.


I loved you, and I should have said it.
But tell me just what has it ever meant?
I can't help it baby, this is who I am.
Sorry, but I can't just go turn off how I feel.
You kill me, you build me up, but just to watch me break.

I know what I should do, but I just can't walk away

Get it together.

I am not going to miss another class. I am going to study for my classes. I am going to start seriously applying for a second job. I am going to work hard and do my part to make my band as good as it can possibly be. I am going to save money. I am going to stop spending so much on fast food. I am going to start eating healthier. I am going to start exercising. I am going to find a way to manage my time better.

I know you don't believe me. And I know I haven't given you any reason to. Yet.

But I'm going to make you proud of me.

Stop whining.

I think it's time for me to stop complaining all the time. I mean, yeah, I miss a certain girl a ton. More than I can even say. And I need a second job, really badly. But I might be getting one soon. And complaining about these things isn't going to change anything. So I'm going to try and stop for a while.

Come back.

I know you miss me. You know I miss you.
I know you still like me. You know I still like you.

So why won't you just let me be yours again? I know I've been selfish and I'm sorry. But I'm ready to do what it takes to change that.

I think there's a reason that a boy living in Omaha, Nebraska just happened to join a band whose show a girl from Tecumseh, Nebraska just happened to miss by twenty minutes. I think there's a reason that those two people just happened to exchange numbers at a Burger King after that show. I think there's a reason she said "yes" when he asked her to be his girlfriend. I think there's a reason he can't even think about any other girl anymore.

Can you please just give us the chance to find out what that reason is?

23.

You'll sit alone forever if you wait for the right time. What are you hoping for?

I'm here, I'm now, I'm ready.

Don't hate me.

Yeah, so. Today was pretty alright until about 4:00. Then Kaci called and couldn't hang out, once again. I miss that girl something crazy. But we did have a good talk, and I finally know that she really does miss me. Not half as much as I miss her, though.

Today.

I finally get to see Kaci this afternoon. I am incredibly excited. I miss her terribly.